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Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

61653 HTAFC

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And people who ask for their drinks by starting with the horribly American “can I get…..”
That's been banned on this thread so many times already, I'd be surprised if anybody out in the real world still says it!

Anyone who drives a Range Rover Sport or Evoque. They look like they've already been through a car-crusher.

People who lease supercars for an evening, and spend all night circling the town centre.
 
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Cowley

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That's been banned on this thread so many times already, I'd be surprised if anybody out in the real world still says it!

Anyone who drives a Range Rover Sport or Evoque. They look like they've already been through a car-crusher.

People who lease supercars for an evening, and spend all night circling the town centre.

I make you right on all of the above. :)
 

MattRat

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People who lease supercars for an evening, and spend all night circling the town centre.
Just ban loud cars from cities in general. You can enjoy them in the countryside without disturbing anyone, why do you insist on disturbing me at 3am in the morning?
 

birchesgreen

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People who lease supercars for an evening, and spend all night circling the town centre.
My ex-boss used to blow loads of cash hiring supercars for a couple of days, he used to drive it to work (coming in latter so everyone was around to see/hear it). So he would hire a supercar and for most of the time it would be parked in a grey business park.

All this obviously endeared him to other staff and business park users who regarded him in such a positive light. :lol:
 

Ianno87

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And people who ask for their drinks by starting with the horribly American “can I get…..”

In my accent "Can I have a Latte?" routinely gets misheard as "Caramel Latte", so I use "get" for this reason.
 

Cowley

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Just ban loud cars from cities in general. You can enjoy them in the countryside without disturbing anyone, why do you insist on disturbing me at 3am in the morning?

Er no thank you!
On a track is the only place for stuff like that.
 

TRAX

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Talking of coffee, I would like to ban anyone from pronouncing Latte "Lar-tay".

It's "Lat-tay", and don't you forget it.

And in the the coffee shop, you should be refused service if you say "Can I get....."

It's "Can I have...." or "I would like..."

"Can I get a lar-tay?" just grates on me. <(
Ban Americanisms then ? Let’s do it
 

gg1

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My ex-boss used to blow loads of cash hiring supercars for a couple of days, he used to drive it to work (coming in latter so everyone was around to see/hear it). So he would hire a supercar and for most of the time it would be parked in a grey business park.

All this obviously endeared him to other staff and business park users who regarded him in such a positive light. :lol:

Someone I used to work with did exactly that once. We were prepared though, the fact the number plate on his own car was BO55 followed by his initials gave everyone prior notice he was a bit of prat.
 

SteveM70

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My boss at an old job was an irritating little man who had a BMW company car and used to condescendingly tell us that we should aspire to be like him and then we too might have BMWs rather than a motley collection of Vauxhall Vectras and the like.

At the time, a mate of mine worked for the Audi dealership in Huddersfield and he arranged for me to have an R8 for a 24 hour test drive. I made the effort to get up extra early so I could park in the boss’s preferred space. Cue bedlam
 

MattRat

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My boss at an old job was an irritating little man who had a BMW company car and used to condescendingly tell us that we should aspire to be like him and then we too might have BMWs rather than a motley collection of Vauxhall Vectras and the like.

At the time, a mate of mine worked for the Audi dealership in Huddersfield and he arranged for me to have an R8 for a 24 hour test drive. I made the effort to get up extra early so I could park in the boss’s preferred space. Cue bedlam
Friendship goals right there.
 

GusB

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Just ban loud cars from cities in general. You can enjoy them in the countryside without disturbing anyone, why do you insist on disturbing me at 3am in the morning?
Loud cars in the countryside disturb everyone for miles around, whatever time of day, and they don't have to be supercars, either; a Corsa with a fat exhaust pipe does the job sufficiently!
 

py_megapixel

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Have I mentioned people who attach Word documents to emails, even when the recipient will not need to edit them?

I tend to word my emails as "Could you please send me a PDF of x" and people still do it!
 

61653 HTAFC

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Loud cars in the countryside disturb everyone for miles around, whatever time of day, and they don't have to be supercars, either; a Corsa with a fat exhaust pipe does the job sufficiently!
My initial post wasn't really a complaint about the noise, more the ostentatious "flexing" (if you'll forgive the "newspeak") that such behaviour implies. If someone behaves the same way in an old Corsa or Saxo (or even better, something like a Yugo or a non-Turbo Renault 5), I view it much more favourably!
 

Gloster

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The phrase ‘Step up to the plate’. It is an Americanism from baseball, which is only rounders, a game played at school by those who can’t play cricket.
 

duncanp

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The phrase ‘Step up to the plate’. It is an Americanism from baseball, which is only rounders, a game played at school by those who can’t play cricket.

And the phrase ballpark figure, which also comes from baseball.
 

gg1

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Have I mentioned people who attach Word documents to emails, even when the recipient will not need to edit them?

I tend to word my emails as "Could you please send me a PDF of x" and people still do it!
Unless it's an especially large (in terms of file size) document, why does it matter?

The two main reasons for creating a PDF of a Word document are to reduce the file size and to prevent the recipient from editing a document when you don't want them to. If neither of these factors apply it seems pointless to do so.
 

AM9

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Pronouncing place names wrong, - especially foreign named places where a half-baked attempt at the local pronunciation is used to give the impression that they know something. Worst examples:
Ibiza - why sound like "eye-beetha", it doesn't impress that the use of the spanish 'z' sounds like a 'th', when the correct pronunciation is "i-beetha" (the i sound as in it)
Iberia - same as above, not "eye-beeria".
Nobody says "eye-tally" instead of 'Italy' do they?

Then there's nuclear, an easy word for english speakers as "new-clear". It certainly isn't "new-killar"!
 

py_megapixel

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Unless it's an especially large (in terms of file size) document, why does it matter?

The two main reasons for creating a PDF of a Word document are to reduce the file size and to prevent the recipient from editing a document when you don't want them to. If neither of these factors apply it seems pointless to do so.
Several reasons:

Smartphones and tablets come, almost universally with a PDF reader but not Word.

If the recipient does not have the correct font installed, they will generally end up with a poorly formatted mess.

Word files often save all kinds of information you don't necessarily want to transmit, and can contain macros which pose a security risk. For this reason, some companies have policies that when requesting documents from external sources or sending documents to external recipients, they must be PDFs.

Also, it's not a good idea to create reliance on a proprietary (and quite expensive) piece of software for no good reason, if you can help it.
 

AM9

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Several reasons:

Smartphones and tablets come, almost universally with a PDF reader but not Word.

If the recipient does not have the correct font installed, they will generally end up with a poorly formatted mess.

Word files often save all kinds of information you don't necessarily want to transmit, and can contain macros which pose a security risk. For this reason, some companies have policies that when requesting documents from external sources or sending documents to external recipients, they must be PDFs.

Also, it's not a good idea to create reliance on a proprietary (and quite expensive) piece of software for no good reason, if you can help it.
The main reson for sending 'pdfs is that they will always look virtually the same on any device, - no formatting differences and as you commented, the font is sent with the document.

Word documents not only contain macros etc., but if they have been edited, the name/login name of the editor is included as well as the details of the change.
 

Calthrop

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Then there's nuclear, an easy word for english speakers as "new-clear". It certainly isn't "new-killar"!

I'm inclined to cut people a good deal of slack (that expression will probably be condemned by some, as an odious Americanism) re the above-quoted: I've seen it suggested -- and own experience would tend to bear this out -- that people from various English-speaking countries (not only none-too-sophisticated Yanks) in fact find the combination "new-clear" in one word, not altogether easy on the tongue. They rather often default to rendering it as "new-killar", "new-kew-lar", or other variations thereof.

Pronouncing place names wrong, - especially foreign named places where a half-baked attempt at the local pronunciation is used to give the impression that they know something. Worst examples:

Iberia - same as above, not "eye-beeria".

And I would submit that Iberia -- pronounced exactly, "eye-beeria"; and the matching adjective Iberian -- are legitimate and centuries-old English words: referring to that part of the European continent which contains Spain and Portugal.
 

py_megapixel

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The main reson for sending 'pdfs is that they will always look virtually the same on any device, - no formatting differences and as you commented, the font is sent with the document.
Indeed. I find it incredibly unprofessional when I receive poorly formatted Word documents, in the knowledge that it looked fine for them and if they'd taken 10 seconds to save as a PDF it would be the same for me. If they can't be bothered taking 10 seconds to send as a PDF, I can't be bothered giving them my custom.
Any company which cares about its brand image shouldn't be using them except where the files being sent need to be edited by the recipient.

Related: I had an NHS department try to email me a Publisher document (even worse for compatibility!) to provide me with information regarding a medical procedure. When I emailed back to them explaining that I do not have access to Publisher and could they please export to PDF and send to me, their response was to print it off and post it to me first class. Waste of money in my opinion considering exporting it is free and takes less than a minute, but whatever.
 

61653 HTAFC

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You can't just tempt someone like that and not expect consequences ;)
As soon as I posted, I knew what I'd set myself up for...

Well played! :)


Another one: people moaning about Americanisms that aren't actually Americanisms. For example, Soccer.
Indeed certain patterns of speech that we associate with American English are really old British quirks that subsequently died out or diminished here, but survived among the early settlers across the pond and became the standard there.
 
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Acey

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Those awful cardboard cling wrap dispensers that invariable fall apart long before you use the contents !
 

adrock1976

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What's it called? It's called Cumbernauld
Pronouncing place names wrong, - especially foreign named places where a half-baked attempt at the local pronunciation is used to give the impression that they know something. Worst examples:
Ibiza - why sound like "eye-beetha", it doesn't impress that the use of the spanish 'z' sounds like a 'th', when the correct pronunciation is "i-beetha" (the i sound as in it)
Iberia - same as above, not "eye-beeria".
Nobody says "eye-tally" instead of 'Italy' do they?

Then there's nuclear, an easy word for english speakers as "new-clear". It certainly isn't "new-killar"!

Also, I have heard people in the USA pronounce missile as "miss-el" compared with the UK "miss-eyel".
 

nlogax

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Another one: people moaning about Americanisms that aren't actually Americanisms. For example, Soccer.
Indeed certain patterns of speech that we associate with American English are really old British quirks that subsequently died out or diminished here, but survived among the early settlers across the pond and became the standard there.

Absolutely this. Usage of certain words comes and goes and moves around the world. We should be more accepting of that, full stop / period ;)
 

75A

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Does it really matter how things are pronounced as long as we get the gist?

In Sussex there's Southwick pronounced 'South Wick' along the coast in Hampshire, there's Southwick pronounced 'Suth ick'

Then what about Gillingham in the West Country (not sure which County) and Gillingham in Kent, etc etc.
 

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