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Comedic "things you would ban": minor things that irritate you

gg1

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Can't remember if this has been mentioned before, but people referring to seasons of a television programme, instead of series. Horrible Americanism!
As a general rule I have a strong aversion to Americanisms but this is one of the few I'm happy to go along with as it eliminates the confusion of the word 'series' having a dual meaning when referring to TV programmes, ie it could be either the latest run of episodes or the entirety of the episodes for that programme.
 
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Paul Jones 88

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Teenage boys from nice clean areas talking with that ridiculous 'rapper/gangsta' accent.
YOU ARE FROM MAIDSTONE, NOT WEST SIDE LOS ANGELES.
 

yorksrob

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I get a bit of a lazy morning on Thursdays as I go in to work later. But this morning I was woken up by a group of people hanging around a bench near my house getting completely drunk and listening to rave music on full blast through tinny speakers. At 7am! They are still at it right now - usually I like to hear the birds in the garden. Never mind.
I’d quite happily ban them from this town.

I've noticed people in pyjamas generally milling around outdoors together on my way to the station for work. Is this "a thing" now, I wonder !
 

alex397

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Teenage boys from nice clean areas talking with that ridiculous 'rapper/gangsta' accent.
YOU ARE FROM MAIDSTONE, NOT WEST SIDE LOS ANGELES.
It’s even funnier when you are walking around a tiny ‘chocolate-box’ type of village with timber framed buildings, then you see a group of lads in tracksuits hanging around the corner shop talking just like that :E
 

gg1

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I've noticed people in pyjamas generally milling around outdoors together on my way to the station for work. Is this "a thing" now, I wonder !
It's been a thing for 10 years or so sadly.

Up until 4 years ago I lived in one of the less salubrious areas of Birmingham, wasn't uncommon to see people doing their shopping wearing pyjamas.
 

Cowley

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Teenage boys from nice clean areas talking with that ridiculous 'rapper/gangsta' accent.
YOU ARE FROM MAIDSTONE, NOT WEST SIDE LOS ANGELES.

Another similar one for me are people that you know come from Devon but have effected an Essex accent for some reason.
 

duncanp

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16 Aug 2012
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Can we ban adverts for Over 50s Life Assurance, even when they are carefully packaged as a funeral plan.

The policies are bad value for money, as you can end up paying in more than is paid out after death.

But also it makes me (at 58) seem like a decrepit coffin dodger every afternoon when I am watching Countdown
 

yorksrob

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If ban work computers taking fifteen minutes to turn off/on. My old four speed record player used to go from 0 - 78 rpm in about two seconds, so these computers are letting the side down.
 

bspahh

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When I become a dictator, first against the wall will be manufacturers of sliced meat who put the slices in a packet, where the tab to open the film lid is on the wrong side to get the top slice.
 

Strat-tastic

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When I become a dictator, first against the wall will be manufacturers of sliced meat who put the slices in a packet, where the tab to open the film lid is on the wrong side to get the top slice.
+1.

I ban 'things' becoming 'things' when it hasn't gone through any democratic process nor anyone having the decency to notify me <(;)
 

Ediswan

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When I become a dictator, first against the wall will be manufacturers of sliced meat who put the slices in a packet, where the tab to open the film lid is on the wrong side to get the top slice.
I almost wrote much the same a few days ago after making a bacon sandwich. Does anybody know why this is done ?
 

birchesgreen

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When I become a dictator, first against the wall will be manufacturers of sliced meat who put the slices in a packet, where the tab to open the film lid is on the wrong side to get the top slice.
Thats quite specific, but can't disagree with that.
 

ABB125

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23 Jul 2016
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Uber drivers who don't seem to understand that it is actually possible to stick the Uber sticker on their door level, instead of at the 10 degrees or so off-level that seems to be prevalent around Birmingham. It's not that difficult! (Though admittedly it's not the easiest job in the world.)
 

birchesgreen

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Uber drivers who don't seem to understand that it is actually possible to stick the Uber sticker on their door level, instead of at the 10 degrees or so off-level that seems to be prevalent around Birmingham. It's not that difficult! (Though admittedly it's not the easiest job in the world.)
I've seen that so often i wonder if thats some sort of strange brand guideline?
 

pitdiver

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22 Jan 2012
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Nottinghamshire
People who run their engines on their enormous cruisers on the Norfolk Broads when there is no need to. Particularly when i am moored next to them in my Rag and Stick.
 

gg1

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Spam as a whole is far to obvious a suggestion, but I'd like to nominate one variety which especially grates:

Retailers stating an offer is 'just for you', when it is in fact a general offer open to anyone.
 
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Ianno87

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Spam as a whole is far to obvious a suggestion, but I'd like to nominate one variety which especially grates:

Retailers stating an offer is 'just for you', when it is in fact a general offer open to anyone.

I'd add - the general Avalanche of E-mail promotions on Black Friday.

Actually, just Black Friday full stop.
 

32475

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2 Nov 2019
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Sandwich
People who pick their nose in a public lift. It’s wrong on so many levels.
(Sorry but the old ones are the best)
 

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