In 1978 I lived in Croydon and got a job in Maidenhead. So, up to Victoria, and across to Paddington where I caught a train just before 0745 which was the only one about that time that got me to Maidenhead in time for 0900 start. It was quite well used but not heaving and it stopped at every single station I seem to remember. Then in 1979 I moved house to Maidenhead. My business required me to go into London on occasion and, as the years progressed, more and more office space was built in and around Maidenhead and more and more people began commuting in as well as out and the service began to reflect that. The commuting flow at Maidenhead is still predominantly to London but, on a London bound train, there will be a large exchange of passengers at Slough. There is also a significant flow beyond Maidenhead outbound to Reading.
Even with the improved services from Paddington outbound in the peak these days if I lived in Croydon and had to commute to Maidenhead I would move house. But then again, I might not. There was a point in my career when I had children established at a good secondary school just outside Reading. We did consider moving not long after the older of the two boys started there and we chose to restrict our search to places where they would still be able to get to the school easily (school bus routes). In the end we extended. If I had chosen to change job whilst they were at that school I would have taken the commuting hit rather than move them to a different school.
Where you choose to live and the resulting commute is a sum of many pieces. For other married couples it may well be a compromise between where the two of them work and if one works in Weybridge and the other in, say, Canary Wharf somewhere like Wandsworth may be a reasonable balance for both parties with one commuting in and the other out of London.
Having retired I now live in Somerset. I still get a buzz out of London (I was born in West London and lived there most of the time until I moved to Croydon for a couple of years and then to Maidenhead) and for all its' faults I think it still has its' attractions. My younger son having spent time in at Nottingham and then Bath Universities now lives in Salisbury and he likes it but he still seems to think one day he would like to live in London for a while.