Minor things on trains which irritate you

[MattRat]

The train itself? Or could it include things you see on a train? Like when everyone tries to sit on their own on a busy train, particularly on trains with vestibules like the Merseyrail trains. It's called PUBLIC transport. You will end up sharing the space with other people at some point.....

Bonus points if they block seats with bags....

 

[AndyMike]

- Everything about CrossCountry’s Voyagers, which have no redeeming features at all, in either class.

- Plug sockets positioned too close to the top of a table or similar obstruction beneath, meaning it’s impossible to insert the plug if it has anything other than the thinnest cable emanating from the bottom of it. Those on most modern devices you’re likely to want to plug in on a train tend to have a much thicker cable, or a USB cable, which cannot be used in these cases.

- In a similar vein, sockets that can only be found by groping around beneath a seat, and into which it’s all but impossible to put a plug without crawling around on your hands and knees to locate exactly where the holes are.

- Announcements saying a particular refreshment item costs “just”, say, £3.99. No, I’ll be the judge of whether that constitutes “just”, thank you very much.

- Grimy windows on EMR Class 222s; far worse than on any other trains I routinely travel on.

- Unserviceable public address systems. This, of everything I’ve mentioned, is surely the least acceptable.

 

[The DJ]

The single First Class seats on LNER's Azuma units with the aisle side support for the table being awkwardly positioned making it difficult for even an average size adult to get in and out of the seat.

 

[py_megapixel]

- Everything about CrossCountry’s Voyagers, which have no redeeming features at all, in either class.

That's a bit harsh. Especially considering your profile says you're from Sheffield, so you will presumably have had the "pleasure" of experiencing Northern's finest. I find the 150s particularly bad for noise, vibration, cramped seating, lack of modern features and general unpleasantness.

 

[MattRat]

That's a bit harsh. Especially considering your profile says you're from Sheffield, so you will presumably have had the "pleasure" of experiencing Northern's finest. I find the 150s particularly bad for noise, vibration, cramped seating, lack of modern features and general unpleasantness.

Except XC also have HSTs. HSTs are probably a little overrated, but they do put a lot of more modern units to shame.

 

[greyman42]

Everything about CrossCountry’s Voyagers, which have no redeeming features at all, in either class.

They have nice big windows if you get a decent seat and their first class is one of the best in my opinion.

 

[dk1]

They have nice big windows if you get a decent seat and their first class is one of the best in my opinion.

Have to agree with you there. At line speed the engines revert to a gentle purr too.

 

[Techniquest]

I recently travelled on two Voyager services, only between Birmingham and Derby but the difference from the 170s the day before was astronomical. For one thing, the bike space wasn't being nicked by some lazy passenger who didn't need it, and the passenger saloon was far superior in just about every conceivable way to the 170s.

When it comes to XC 170s, I can't get off them quick enough but at least a Voyager is far more pleasant!

 

[Whistler40145]

I sometimes feel 390s have square wheels giving a rather uncomfortable ride

 

[Clansman]

Class 334 automated announcements and their constant overuse of up inflections making everything sound like a question.

Oh come on, that's one of the best quirks about ScotRail!

Strangely despite the upward inflections being recorded, they are only ever used on the 334s.

So in that regard you could say on the other classes which use the NatEx era recorded ScotRail announcements (as hsed onboard 156/158/170/318/320/380s) are incorrect for not using them when listing stations.

 

[MattRat]

I sometimes feel 390s have square wheels giving a rather uncomfortable ride

Why is there always someone bashing the 390s? I think you'll realise just how good they actually are when the 80xs come in to run alongside them. Speaking of which, it is a pet peive of mine that everyone seems to be using or buying them. Surely there could be better options?

 

[fgwrich]

Why is there always someone bashing the 390s? I think you'll realise just how good they actually are when the 80xs come in to run alongside them. Speaking of which, it is a pet peive of mine that everyone seems to be using or buying them. Surely there could be better options?

Have to agree, but in a similar vein for 150s. Yes, the Northern fleet might feel like it's 20 years behind the times, noisy and unloved, but at least the West Country versions are a lot better. Heck, I would even go as far as saying they are the unsung heroes of the GW West Fleet given the Turbo / 158 / HST and IET availability.

Speaking of the IETs - the unnecessary heavy and ridiculously designed standard toilet doors. Not only is the handle too close to the sink, but they are heavy and the lock design is cumbersome.

 

[Bletchleyite]

They have nice big windows if you get a decent seat and their first class is one of the best in my opinion.

The First Class seats are the same as the Pendolino First Class seats, which are the best ones on the network in my view (and being retained in the refurb). I also don't think the Standard seats are bad but by modern standards they are quite thick-backed so legroom is very poor. No doubt they're fine if you can fit your knees in the "niche" but my "rugby thighs" (I don't actually play rugby but you get the idea) mean I physically can't do that.

Standard a bit cramped, though the ex-Virgin "Coach D" layout shows how good they can be.

Apart from being polluting niffy diesels and smelling of the bogs, though, the main annoyances to me are the lack of luggage space due to the uselessly small overheads plus the fact that the reservation displays never quite work properly (you'd have thought they'd have fitted a stick-on replacement like LNER's battery powered ones by now).

 

[py_megapixel]

Speaking of the IETs - the unnecessary heavy and ridiculously designed standard toilet doors. Not only is the handle too close to the sink, but they are heavy and the lock design is cumbersome.

Doesn't seem that cumbersome to me - just turn a lever clockwise to lock and anticlockwise to unlock.

I do have another peeve with those locks though, which is that it's not immediately obvious from the outside whether the toilet is occupied or not as the indicator is slightly too low down and the vestibule is not all that brightly lit. (Also I'm surprised that only having red/green sections was allowed, shouldn't they also have text on them for colourblind people?)

the reservation displays never quite work properly (you'd have thought they'd have fitted a stick-on replacement like LNER's battery powered ones by now).

They have times when they don't work at all (i.e. all blank or all showing unreserved) but I'm not quite sure what you mean by "never quite work properly". They usually seem to be showing something like

53 AVAILABLE
54 RESERVED STAFFORD TO OXFORD

which seems perfectly reasonable to me?

I obviously can't check that the displayed text matches everyone's reservations, but it's always worked for mine.

 

[Bletchleyite]

They have times when they don't work at all (i.e. all blank or all showing unreserved) but I'm not quite sure what you mean by "never quite work properly". They usually seem to be showing something like

53 AVAILABLE
54 RESERVED STAFFORD TO OXFORD

which seems perfectly reasonable to me?

I obviously can't check that the displayed text matches everyone's reservations, but it's always worked for mine.

When they work they work correctly, but I find that on any given Voyager there is almost always one coach with a power fault causing them to be off, and that's almost always mine!

 

[Phil R]

This happened to me yesterday, not for the first time. Previously it's left me undercarried the first time and overcarried the second.
I suspect Desiro door button lights don't go out until 'significantly' after the door close cycle commences. However the door opening capability seems to be disabled before that point, or it just takes forever to get going prior to being overridden by the close. Seems the same issue with internal and external doors alike. So, you press the button for a good few seconds and nothing happens, next thing you know is the train is off and you are not going to be where you wanted to be for a little while. Learning point, if leaving it a bit fine, use a door that's already open.
Engineers or traincrew may be able to shed some light on my amateur theory?

 

[Parallel]

Oh come on, that's one of the best quirks about ScotRail!

Strangely despite the upward inflections being recorded, they are only ever used on the 334s.

So in that regard you could say on the other classes which use the NatEx era recorded ScotRail announcements (as hsed onboard 156/158/170/318/320/380s) are incorrect for not using them when listing stations.

A lot of the systems on other stock can only announce one inflection, such as the 80x units and the PIS fitted to ScotRail's 158s/170s etc. The 156s and the HSTs should be capable of upwards inflections though as it is TrainFX as seen on other TOCs - but ScotRail haven't configured it to do so (Except for Edinburgh Gateway? Which sounds like a question).

 

[southern442]

I don't like how 180s seemingly at random intervals decide to pretend to be DLR trains and shake themselves to bits for a while. Very disconcerting at 125mph.

 

[trebor79]

Push button operated self-opening toilet doors are the worst. With buttons that do not operate as they lead you to expect them to.

So you go in, and manage to make the door shut itself; everything seems to be OK, so you proceed to business.

So you're happily discussing an important contract, when all of a sudden, for no reason, the door begins to slide open. There isn't anyone outside who's just opened it, it just decided to come open of its own accord in response to some random electronic whim that took its fancy.

And you can't bloody stop it. You mash frantically at the close button, but nothing happens. It ignores all input and just grinds slowly and inexorably all the way to the fully open position. The wide, gaping, disabled-access-compliant fully open position that lays bare all concealment.

Only when the door has completed its full travel, at a pace that would handily win it a slow race for snails, does it finally condescend to take notice of the panicked hammering on its button, and slowly, oh so slowly grinds its way closed again with the same molluscine absence of urgency. And all the while a carriage full of passengers are trying to peek at your commercial secrets.

That happened to me on a Mk4 set once. I wa siding the disabled toilet, and noticed the "Lock" button was illuminated. I couldn't remember if I'd pressed it or not, then started wondering if it being illuminated meant to door was locked, or would lock if I pressed the button.
So I pressed it and was horrified when the door started opening! Experienced that same slow grind. Fortunately there were no witnesses!

 

[Milo T.K]

Toilets on a 700 always seemingly vandalised on every train......

 

[Clansman]

A lot of the systems on other stock can only announce one inflection, such as the 80x units and the PIS fitted to ScotRail's 158s/170s etc. The 156s and the HSTs should be capable of upwards inflections though as it is TrainFX as seen on other TOCs - but ScotRail haven't configured it to do so (Except for Edinburgh Gateway? Which sounds like a question).

I thought it was all TrainFX on everything with the same set of announcement recordings. It,xs just thay 334s had different recordings installed in different formats vice the rest.

It's the same dot matrix displays and announcement recordings. There's an interview somewhere with Fletcher Mathers who recorded the announcements and she said originally each station had 2 variants; 1 standard and 1 inflected.

Even the HSTs use it, which is strange as I recall on the first refurb service they used new recordings akin to tye 385s, before reverting back to the same old for whatever reason.

Edinburgh Gateway was a new recording since it was never a station name that was forseen to be needed in future (such as the Borders Railway stations which were all recorded before it was even announced!), 15 years after the original recordings (same with Alloa), so has a different tone which I suspect is down to using newer equipment and Ms Mathers' ageing voice.

 

[AndyMike]

That's a bit harsh. Especially considering your profile says you're from Sheffield, so you will presumably have had the "pleasure" of experiencing Northern's finest. I find the 150s particularly bad for noise, vibration, cramped seating, lack of modern features and general unpleasantness.

I’m happier tolerating Northern over short distances than I am XC over long ones.

Except XC also have HSTs. HSTs are probably a little overrated, but they do put a lot of more modern units to shame.

Indeed. Far nicer than the cramped, uncomfortable, smelly Voyagers.

The First Class seats are the same as the Pendolino First Class seats, which are the best ones on the network in my view (and being retained in the refurb). I also don't think the Standard seats are bad but by modern standards they are quite thick-backed so legroom is very poor. No doubt they're fine if you can fit your knees in the "niche" but my "rugby thighs" (I don't actually play rugby but you get the idea) mean I physically can't do that.

Standard a bit cramped, though the ex-Virgin "Coach D" layout shows how good they can be.

Apart from being polluting niffy diesels and smelling of the bogs, though, the main annoyances to me are the lack of luggage space due to the uselessly small overheads plus the fact that the reservation displays never quite work properly (you'd have thought they'd have fitted a stick-on replacement like LNER's battery powered ones by now).

Far too few table seats as well.

 

[Mordac]

Have to agree with you there. At line speed the engines revert to a gentle purr too.

Yeah some people think I'm crazy when I say this, but I find they hum quite gently at full pelt. Have some nice memories of speeding down the Clyde valley in one and looking out at the landscape through the massive windows while the engines hum underneath.

It's at low speed that they sound bad, especially because they seem to trigger the interior panels to vibrate at when they're at that frequency.

 

[silexa]

The smell of the vestibules in Voyagers, specifically the ones where the loo's are...

 

[QSK19]

The smell of the vestibules in Voyagers, specifically the ones where the loo's are...

And the Meridians too - even on a short hop to/from Leicester, it’s been enough to knock you out!

 

[silexa]

And the Meridians too - even on a short hop to/from Leicester, it’s been enough to knock you out!

No lie there. I don't understand why it's always so pungent!

 

[miklcct]

I need to press the button to open train doors, unlike London Underground where all train doors open automatically.
Not all trains have 5 pairs of doors in each carriages, making boarding and alighting slow.
The position of door layout is not unified across the country, such that it's impossible to draw queuing lines on the platform for efficient boarding and alighting.
Not all platforms and train floor are built to the same height, requiring a step to board some trains.

 

[MattRat]

The smell of the vestibules in Voyagers, specifically the ones where the loo's are...

I imagine that's to do with the tilting catching people off guard when they go the loo....

 

[Bletchleyite]

I imagine that's to do with the tilting catching people off guard when they go the loo....

It's because of the vents for the toilet tank being too close to the air intake for the saloon. BR made similar errors, to be fair, putting the intakes too close to the brakes which caused that horrible "burning brakes" niff on Mk3 LHCS.

 

[SCDR_WMR]

The noise 390s make - living next to the WCML, they are so much more noisy than the 350s that also pass. I'd even say some frieghts make less of a noise!